Sophie Sunday Selfie

🎶 Raindrops keep falling on my head ☔️ But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turning red 
Crying's not for me 'Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complaining…
But there's one thing I know
The blues they send to meet me
Won't defeat me, it won't be long
Till happiness steps up to greet me ☀️🎶. This song reminds me of my grandpa. The first time I can remember hearing it we were in his truck. One of those big country type trucks. He had carpeted type car seat covers that were scratchy. They were kind of an Aztec pattern and the whole truck smelled of fuel and a bit of dust. I miss my grandpa. He was a staple in my life, even though when I was at their house it was grandma I was always with. Playing a duet with her in the organ, putting in a singing/dance show, watching I Love Lucy and trying to get one more bumpy piece of candy from her jar (even though they were all hopelessly stuck together. 

Do memories ever want to make you cry? The ones that are engrained into your mind and cover you like a warm blanket? Even though this week has been heavy and I’ve felt slow and my heart has been heavy, it’s been good. Good to reflect, good to make course corrections and good to feel deeply. To let the emotions come and wash over me. The rain we woke up to was fitting and this song came right into my head as I looked out the window. Kevin, being an Oregonian is in heaven with this kind of weather. Sophie just wants any excuse to hold the umbrella. 

As for me, I’ve reflected and come to the conclusion that I had a sprint of self love practices a few months ago but it didn’t stick. While I was doing it, I felt happy, I felt grateful and I felt uncomfortable complimenting myself. But I felt small changes....then life got busy and I stopped. I’m committing myself to not sprint, to not go all all ALL out, but to be slow, steady and consistent with being nice to myself. Because only then can I truly help others with everything in me. Let the rain wash away the past, but leave me with all my priceless memories. May the Lord guide my steps into the future. I’m ready for you Monday. Bring it.

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